Even More Miscreants

The Double Dealing Diphthong

The Double Dealing Diphthong would struggle with the truth

It ranted and raved throughout each day

And constantly stood aloof

The problem was the Vowels both long and short

It accused them of dishonesty

And integrity to be bought

So the debate raged as all were engaged

In a squabble where things turned sour

The language was rough with no anger assuaged

They argued hour by hour

The trouble was the way things were said

With A E I O and U

The Diphthong declared good diction was dead

And this caused a hullabaloo

The Vowels fought back with potent attack

And offered a number of tips

The trouble they said was the shape of the back

And the lazy use of the lips

Not so said the the Diphthong against the trend

Extremely sure of itself

There’s a desperate need it duly agreed to carefully mend the blend

But the Vowels demurred and loudly chaffed

Declaring the Diphthong wrong

Then highly amused they raucously laughed

And burst into happy song

Now a point of interest is the change today

There are signs now of a solution

The letters’ betters have something to say

Approaching a revolution

It is like this, if things go amiss,

Whether they’re alive or neuter

You can rescue your thinking from its abyss

Just hand over to a computer


The Over-talkative Robot

Once on a lot there was a robot

Whose workings went badly amiss

Most of its functions were in the right slot

But in one way it was remiss

It started to chatter and just wouldn’t cease

That prattle could be heard coast to coast

With clatter so loud it disturbed the peace

And would shatter the nerves of a ghost

The voice was so loud it seemed very proud

To radiate sound like a stentor

Its words intruded in volume so loud

It became a virtual tormentor

The minds of the owners sought disowners

And they were extremely nervous

The words of the robot were hardly a bonus

With its pleasure to be of service

But on and on and on went that voice

Entrapped in its own repetition

The listeners were stricken without any choice

Prone to robotic rendition

You cannot rule out that the law was broken

There was harm with humans offended

But the breach was clearly merely token

As the crime was not intended

And yet as can happen there was one ray of hope

An idea from a scientist’s spouse

There was one place where no listeners would mope

The West Wing of the White House

So there it stays gabbling through its days

Attracting respectful attention

And only rarely when in public gaze

Does the President get a mention


The World’s Greatest Liar

He was born on a mountain top in Tennessee

The greatest liar you ever did see

Flew to the moon one famous day in June

Wrote the words of anthems and then composed a tune

Defrocked Mussolini down Italy way

And was a secret agent of the CIA

Made his first ten trillion selling shares in oil

Invented the first working model of the hydrofoil

Flew off to China in a solar-driven plane

Then had supper with the President of Spain

Took up acting wherein he was adored

Starred in a hit for an Academy Award

Wrote the first version of Gone With The Wind

Kidnapped Al Capone soon after he had sinned

Had his own series on pay TV

Bought the Mona Lisa on a spending spree

Built the Sydney Harbour Bridge in his spare time

Helped to make the FBI the enemy of crime

Often spends his holidays in Buckingham Palace

Controls a federal agency eliminating malice

He is highly famous solving your privations

And he gives a frequent speech at the United Nations

Nominated twenty times for the Hall of Fame

Many thousand voices still give him wild acclaim

There are countless triumphs for this doer of deeds

When pretence is needed, that is when he leads

But do you know the latest plans that have just occurred?

He will soon be President; on that we have his word


The Man Who Knew Almost Everything

Winston Wise rarely felt surprise

As all things got his attention

There was nothing on earth that escaped his eyes

Or was outside his comprehension

He rejoiced in the stars knew all about cars

And read all the pages of history

Was very well versed in civic faux pas

Nothing to him was a mystery

He would talk for hours about ivory towers

And read all of Shakespeare’s plays 

He made sense of climate from cyclones to showers

And even probed the sun’s rays

In the field of law he knew so much more

While vast was his knowledge of money

The world of science was an open door

And his mastery of crime wasn’t funny

He was with films an encyclopaedia

With commerce indeed a true master

Had a grasp of all of the modern media

Saw war as a total disaster

He spoke several tongues was a star of linguistics

And famous for his diary

He was also ballistic in the field of statistics

Which guided his expert enquiry

As the days passed by there were those who would try

To fathom the extent of his learning

The challenge for them was far too high

They were but mere humans discerning

But wait a minute there was one doubt

That caused a little surprise

He said to his wife with a smile bobbing out:

“I’m fazed by that love in your eyes.”



Beautiful person

Aide to the tyrant

Close to power at the witching hour

Why tie yourself to the villain?

Is it because you need authority

That is far above sorority?

You have bought your influence

As part of a confluence

With a vile continuity

That brings you false respect

And support for superfluity

You have tied yourself

To the greatest source of power

Known to mankind

It’s a union shaped by hell

And you know deception well

Thus you rise out of the demise

Of truth and gentle pity

You enforce the divorce

Of kindness and love

As heaven above weeps in sorrow

Until with the hateful reign

Society bleeds and cries out in pain

Yours is now the destiny that walks beside doom

Sharing a room with oppression

That ensures the repression

Of peace and beauty and love

So sad it is

Yes bad it is

For your future can never be

Part of democracy’s dream of the free

And the worth

Of all that we need to be

If harmony is to reign on earth


Snake Oil Salesman

There you stand

Proclaiming your own virtue

With the light of fake morality reflected in your eyes

A rogue in disguise

Whose words eulogise

And cover up each dark deed you do

How full of risk you really are!

Outstripping by far

The declared humility of your false identity

You trumpet your bogus virtue

Many times over

Presented as reality by the lies you tell

Ideas garnished like goods to sell

In sickening banality

So note this please as pain to ease

You with all your false regalia 

Are doomed to failure

Your fame that seems so great

Will by its very nature disintegrate

And fall around you like a Slough of Despond

Thus will you not reach beyond despair 

As the sound of your voice pollutes the air

To make our earth a purgatory of disaster

That only the likes of you would seek to master

Heed this now

You, despite your place in an ivory tower,

Are a figure who makes even angels glower

An entity – identity, aiming for the greatest heights

But doomed to give our suffering world last rites

Therefore bicker on with your futile foray

And it shall follow as the night the day

There’s no way your affray will allay the dismay


False Acclaim

You clap your hands like a tycoon

Suddenly discovering wealth

With a weird mystique of pretentiousness

You are really clapping yourself

What is the reason for this season of self acclamation?

It is the fable that displays itself for the good of the nation

You strut on the stage like a peacock

With a mad desire for a mate

You open doors with a counterfeit knock

And then you gesticulate

A question arises from the crowd in shock

How could he matriculate? 

The next thing you do is nod your head

Accepting the fake glory

Then you wave your arms as the meek are led

By their ears to accept your story

On that stage you show fake rage

To disguise your lies as reality

Your babble flows on to another page

In a fictitious form of normality

While this goes on many people die

With a virus out of control

Your ignorance is noted by the well trained eye

You have no wit to extol

Yet still there are cheers mere fragile veneers

While you clap yourself even longer

The noise is your cover to hide the fears

Truth dies as your lies grow stronger

Your vanity’s disguised as fake disdain

Contempt on your bleak face lurking

With your folly no hopes remain

No plan of yours is working

So clap on child of a gorgon as times pass

The doom of the world’s in your hands

It’s the face of a fool in your looking glass

Your downfall is what truth demands


Old King Cole: Halfwit

Old King Cole was a stupid old soul

A vacuous halfwit was he

He lied for his supper in his usual role

And sacked his fiddlers three

One day he got sick with a painful rash

That made him a very slow mover

He went to a store with loads of cash

To buy and drink stain remover

That did him harm and he nearly died

Some doctors called him a fool

So he took fly spray to fix his inside

Which made him look like a ghoul

King Cole as a boss was never at a loss

With an image he thought allured

He proudly gave his big head a toss

And announced to the world he was cured

Then off he went to parliament

Denying he was contagious

He infected victims wherever he went

In a manner clearly outrageous

He was so enraged when they held a debate

He allowed no word in edgewise

Old King Cole was so irate

A bully on a hideous enterprise

But the end was quick for that king who was sick

A republic was the call

They had grown tired of each sinister trick

Now no one recalls him at all

Old King Cole was a stupid old soul

A vacuous halfwit was he

He lied for his supper in his usual role

And sacked his fiddlers three


A Beautiful World

I wandered alone and the birds talked to me

It was a lively conversation

I noticed the sky and was touched by its mystery

As I walked

A number of butterflies danced on the air

As if they were grateful to be alive

This forest was an array of undamaged trees

Standing stoically strong

Their shade was a comfort

The path wove its way between those trees

The sun was casting shafts of gentle light among them

Beautiful fungi were clustered around many trunks

An array of other things caught my eye

Including technicolour flowers

And I saw bees as willing tradesmen

Getting on with their business

Into one corner of my gaze came a possum

Eating a blossom

It seemed to regard me as a trusted friend

Further on I came to a crystal stream

Wending its way as they all do down from the hills 

I saw my reflection

Where the water was not flowing

I seemed to be part of that place

So I stayed a while 

Keen to look where the brook was moving

And above its ripples I saw a dragonfly hovering

Fixed above the water like a painting

Below the golden aura of a crayfish caught my eye

And an unnamed fish went swimming by

There was a peace in that place

And music

I heard voices there pleading with me to look after things

And the cry that all men are brothers

It gave me time to think of others

Torn apart by poverty and war and other men’s greed

There I learned I would not be forgiven

If all I do is listen to the music


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